Hello beautiful people.
I really dislike topics like this but someone asked me this week and she said she really wants me to write about my view, first of all, I can't change anyone's mind so ild just go with the policy I follow.
Welllllll, in this 21st century, it doesn't matter o! Before, I heard on your wedding night they would put white cloth to see if blood would come out and all those stuff but now, no body really checks those things but coming back to your personal self.
Now, I'm not going to use myself so I don't either sound too bad or too perfect, ild use me advising my daughter.
Don't you think your partner of many years (Later your husband) would be extremely proud of you when he finds out he is the first man doing it?
Though I don't think anyone should be defined by that because some virgins don't have any sense, just virgin for mouth but no character and also some didn't mean to do it but circumstances around.. but for those normal ladies, I feel if you can try to keep it, you really should. I don't think it's a thing of joy or happiness to see your "ex's" and they know they've gone down there and they've moved on.. It makes your husband even have a different mindset about you.
Also sex is a sacred thing (it's so sad to see that it's a normal thing, you would hear someone slept with multiple guys in a day! Ah!) this means the person is going inside the deepest part of you and it brings out your true emotions, feelings etc, I don't think it should be done with just anyone so basically ild advice my daughter that she should please take her time and not rush it and she should really wait because following the bible (lol many parents broke this rule) you should wait till after you are married.
it's very sad that I have one friend, very nice boy but when it comes to women he is something else so he has dis virgined many girls, only for him to tell me that he would love to marry a virgin that he can't marry someone who isn't a virgin. I'm like really? You ?
So it's so sad that we ladies can get tested and know if we aren't virgins and it's so unfair on our part because we have to keep ours but guys can do whatever they want, why can't we (ladies) marry virgin husbands too if being a Virgin is that compulsory for ladies?
Also someone was telling me about the pressure you get from your partner about sex. Hmm, depends on the partner because trust me some guys are very understanding. They ask for it but when you explain they just take it and "wait", many other things can be done in a relationship not necessarily sex. I can never do such sacred thing through pressure, which kind pressure when there are many fishes in the sea? It's okay if I'm doing it from my mind but don't say pressure, he isn't your husband he is just your "boyfriend" ..
It's even so annoying how you would see all these small boyfriends asking for sex, how many things do you know that you are asking for sex?
It's not even about being a virgin like I know one lady, I heard she was a Virgin and she kept herself till marriage and her sister on the other is jaiyejaiye. That one has probably aborted a lot but if you see them today hmm Aunty jaiyejaiye is doing very okay and Aunty Virgin is just dumbfounded. They are both married. So I'm not even talking about the bright side , I'm just saying personally if you can keep it, just keep trying and you wouldn't regret it, don't keep it because of what you want your husband to say (some guys don't care) but keep it because you don't basically want to feel used and it's a sacred thing like I said, so I don't think it should be done with multiple people.
So to me, being a Virgin in this 21st century doesn't matter but personally and spiritually I think it really matters, if you can keep it just keep it. So many ladies would wish they could take their sex back from a guy and I strongly believe it makes your husband respect you more...
I really want to know what you think particularly about this topic, I want to read other people's opinion too, please either comment or send me a message. damstarstudio@icloud.com
PLEASE READ AND SHARE! Thank you!!
A woman's pride is her virginity !There are soo many things that being in the 21st century has changed that I really don't like but what can we do ?People live by the rules society make now . I agree with you ,if you can keep it ,keep it ��
ReplyDeleteYear,if u can keep it, keep it and if u can't, make its a decision that u can leave with...cos I tell u it's not easy,some there's due to circumstances beyond there control,e.g (rape)..I can testify to that..but if u can keep urs,it's all well and good.
ReplyDeleteIts funny our society expect men to mess around n ladies not to. Virgin or no virgin doesnt matter in my own opinion. Decency is the main thing. She has a couple of bfs before getting married is different from she slept with every tom , dick n harry before she got married. Let ladies be decent. Think before opening ur legs. And it is a 100% truth that ur man will be ontop of the world if he is the only man to ever been down dere. But at the sametime, "what is after 6 is more that 7" (lol). #Safe!!!
ReplyDeleteWell,I'll just say this...A lot of abnormalities are now said to be normal. If only people understand that sex is beyond physical, that it is spiritual,it's a blood covenant. Being a Virgin is a pride to oneself, one's husband and even God, it does matter believe me but then if one had been sexually abused before that's a different story entirely and God still loves such person regardless. I'll just say do God proud by keeping yourself and if you've made a mistake once it's okay (no one holy pass) however because grace is sufficient enough does not mean that grace should be abused, because when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable,my opinion.
ReplyDeleteWell,I'll just say this...A lot of abnormalities are now said to be normal. If only people understand that sex is beyond physical, that it is spiritual,it's a blood covenant. Being a Virgin is a pride to oneself, one's husband and even God, it does matter believe me but then if one had been sexually abused before that's a different story entirely and God still loves such person regardless. I'll just say do God proud by keeping yourself and if you've made a mistake once it's okay (no one holy pass) however because grace is sufficient enough does not mean that grace should be abused, because when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable,my opinion.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest virgin or not virgin doesn't matter "IN THE 21ST CENTURY" and I find it really stupid when guys like the one you made an example with expect to marry a virgin when they themselves aren't..in my opinion a guy who is not a virgin shouldn't be treating a lady who isn't any less of herself. God hasn't placed virginity in us to make your head swell as a guy it's more of a covenant between the lady and God. That said, I personally think it is better off to keep your virginity till you're married not just because of a man but because in the eyes of God the first person you have sex with is technically who you're married to. I mean Adam and Eve had no owambe or asoebi before God called them man and wife so in that view it's best to keep yourself until marriage and also to honour God and receive so many blessings He's promised for that sacrifice. However if situations beyond your control happen and you loose it before marriage, don't beat yourself down just talk to God I'm pretty sure He'll have mercy on you and you might be as good as a virgin(if you decide to abstain until marriage). I'm so sorry about my long comment����
ReplyDeleteVery Interesting Topic....Well Like You Said Really In This 21st Century Its Hard...But Then Again The Fact That One Isnt a Virgin Doesn't She's Bad or Useless etc...Like U Mentioned Some Virgins are Very Useless.Speaking From My Own View..For Guys If You:ve Had Multiple Sex pathners before Eventually Getting Married ..I see No Reason Why You Shoulf Be Hell Bent On Wanting To Marry A Virgin For Yourself..What About The Other Girls You've Finished With? (Im giving reference to that Your Friend Who says he can only marry a Virgin).
ReplyDeleteI agree with all you said but that last part really touched me, am no more a virgin and I wish I could take my sex back from the idiot I gave it to, I feel so used but I know God has forgiven me. I advice young ladies to keep their virginity till marriage or a very mature state of mind
ReplyDeleteLet's be real here...we just have to be real and truthful.I read most of the comments and it's like,keep your virginity till marriage and all....
ReplyDeleteDo you know that it's not all men that value this so called virginity!I can tell you not 50% of them cherish it...
Ive come across men tnat disvigined their wife and still treats that same wife like shes a whore,havent you seen a woman with 3kids getting married to a single man with no child?ive also come across a woman that was disvirgined by her husband and the man treates her like a Queen....it comes in differnt forms,while I buy the idea of keeping it first cos that's what God the Almighty ordained us as a woman to do till we are married...Sex is also an integral part of a relationship.
Now I'm not the devil here encouraging sex before marriage,if you must have it,it's a choice,and it shouldn't be that the guy who took my virginity is a jerk and Iwish I had it back ,lol no
If a boy Nd a girl had sex,there shouldn't be the mentality that the guy had upper hand n used her, (African mentality)they used theirselves abeg.
While I don't even buy the idea of sex,I prefer love making..
The truth is that whatever decision a lady takes as regards this,should be firm and bold ,not with one full of regrets.